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Steps to Becoming A Partner In Your Child's Education
by David Drayfirth
http://www.fseducation.com

It was an experiment in education. On a late winter
afternoon ten years ago, I knelt on the ground in our city's
public common, holding one end of a piece of string tight to
the very edge of a stone parapet surrounding the reflecting
pool. Twenty feet away and moving, one of my son's
classmates was crawling backward, inch by careful inch,
allowing the ball of twine he held to unwind till he reached
the far end of the pool.

Being a partner in your child's education means more than
helping with homework, or volunteering to chaperone school
field trips, though those can be a part of the equation. It
includes being aware of what your child is being taught in
school and by what methods. It requires that you support the
authority of the teacher in the classroom, without losing
sight of the needs of your child. It will often mean
stepping back, taking a deep breath, and letting your child
handle it himself - whether 'it' is a particularly tough
class project, or difficulty getting along with another
student.

As a family advocate working in a neighborhood center, I
often heard parents complain that teachers didn't treat
their children fairly, or didn't understand what their child
needed. At the same time, I heard repeatedly from teachers
that parents were non-responsive to invitations to parent
conferences, or didn't even care enough to make sure that
homework was finished.

When that happens, the only loser is the child. The benefits
of involved parents have been reaffirmed by study after
study. Children whose parents are involved enough to know
their children's classmates, who help with homework and ask
important question enjoy school more and learn far more than
their classmates whose parents are not involved.

If you're interested in becoming a more active partner in
your child's education, these simple hints can help you take
the first step toward a good, working partnership with your
child's teacher.

As a parent, it is up to you to take the first step toward
forming a partnership with your child's teacher. It is your
job to be your child's advocate with the school system to
get them the things they to foster their education and
learning. Especially if your child has special needs, his
teacher can be your most effective ally in forcing the
school department to provide accomodations that your child
may need to get the most out of his education.

1. The key word is communication. Call the school and make
an appointment to meet with your child's teacher to discuss
his or her progress. Set aside any hostility before the
meeting. Remember, the goal is to figure out how you can
work WITH the teacher.

2. Before you go, prepare yourself with a list of questions
to ask so that you walk away from the meeting with a better
understanding of how your child is being taught. Some
questions you might ask are: Is my child working up to his
ability? What specific problems, if any, does my child need
help with? Does the school (or your class) use a standard
curriculum? If so, which curriculum is it? Under what
circumstances will you call me about my child's behavior or
performance? What are my child's strengths, and how can we
enhance them? When is the best time to call you if I have
questions about my child's progress?

3. Remember that communication is a two-way street. Once you
know what problems the teacher might be having, you can
offer things like behavioral strategies that work at home,
information about your child's interests that might help in
fine-tuning an educational approach, or other information
that can help his teacher understand what's going on in his
life. Knowing that your child is struggling with the death
of a loved pet can make a huge difference in his teacher's
perception of his sudden lack of interest in school.

The most important thing to keep in mind is that your child
splits his day between home and school. It's to his benefit
if all the adults that have charge of him over the course of
a day are on the same page and working together.

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